Or better yet who didn’t tell you who you were? I was in church yesterday serving and in my section I noticed a young man. He was taller than me, had way more hair than me, currently cut into a box fade. He was a young man full of energy that could not have been more than 17 years old. That is what I saw, and then he and the young lady he was with asked me a question. His voice came out in a soft feminine way; a tone that I must say startled me at first. I began to notice subtleties of how he carried himself, how he held his hands how he rolled his eyes at some of the things the young lady stated to him. My heart began to hurt as I began to see him duplicate obviously how he perceived a woman to act. It began to make me think about the generation we are living in and question, why through-out my lifetime I had seen a shift in our culture that said it was normal even "cool" for people to feel comfortable with being something other than what God designed them to be.
I began to pray for the young man, and along with that began to think through how this could have happened. The question that popped in my head was who told this young man that he should act like a woman. Then a better question popped in my spirit. WHO DIDN’T tell this young man that he was a man, destine to raise a son or daughter of his own and speak life into them. In Genesis 1 the bible says he was created in Gods own image, created him as a male and a female as a female. Who didn’t tell him that God’s first command to him and the future wife in his life was to “be fruitful and multiply”.
Now before you tune me out. Let me say this. My point of view is based solely on the bible. This as you will soon read is not a homosexual thing, but a Father thing. I believe that we are witnessing the effects of fathers not being present physically or emotionally in the home. It causes so many conflicts in society.
I am only assuming but maybe like me there was not a father in his life, or a strong father figure in his life. Yes, I know what assuming makes you so I will give you the facts stated from people who have studied the matter more than I have:
· “I have worked with thousands of homosexuals. I have never seen a homosexual who had a loving respectful relationship with his father.” - Dr. Joseph Nicolosi
· “Boys who grow up in father absent homes are more likely than those in father present homes to have trouble establishing appropriate sex roles and gender identity.” - P.L. Adams, J.R. Milner, Fatherless Children
Here are some of the other facts I found.
- 85% of the people incarcerated came from fatherless homes
- 71% of the dropouts came from fatherless homes
- 63% of the suicides came from fatherless homes.
The list goes on and on. So here is my point to all this. We are living in a generation that has been effected by fathers not being in their place, and I will go as far to say that even when fathers are in the home sometimes they are not in their place. So why is it so important for men to be in the household. I watched a movie called “Courageous” which was a very eye opening experience. I really felt I was a good father but this movie showed me how much I could really improve. The main thing I saw though was that it was important for fathers to speak life and purpose into their children’s life. Throughout the bible there are examples of fathers who spoke purpose and life to their children. The names that they gave their children would become part of their identity. The crafts that the father took on were taught to their children. Jesus was a carpenter, just like his earthly father Joseph. Since the beginning God has given man the ability to call out purpose into thing he had made man covering for. Adam named Eve woman “because she was bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh” and “because she was taken out of man” [Genesis 2:23]. The word woman designated the special gifts that every woman encompasses. A man will never be able to do what a woman can do. That gift has been given to every man. We have the power to speak “life and death”. That is what our Father in heaven has spoken into our lives.
This is a plea to all men to as my co-host (Christian comedian) Deon Mr. Dynamite Miller says, man up. I believe if we do a better job at getting and keeping fathers back in the homes, we will see in change in our generation for the better. Children come from a man and a women, it is the only way they come to this earth. With that in mind, since both male and female have contribution to making the child, should it not be obvious how important it is for both of them to impart into their children. I met my own father at the age of 35, which really solidified this point to me. Although I had never spent any time with him until then, I immediately notice certain things in my life that were parallel to his life. Even though I grew up saying I would not be like my father. I found that I was like him. Imagine if he were there to show me how not to make the same mistakes he made. I believe God can change the damage that has already been done, but we can start doing this fatherhood thing right. Even if you are like me and cannot physically be in your children’s life 24/7 I challenge you to find a way to spend more time, quality time with them. I challenge you to take the time and get yourself in line with God’s purpose for your life and then in turn speak and teach purpose in your children’s life. Tell them who they are every day. Don’t let the world, their friends, their community, or their own flesh tell them who they are. Gather direction from God and give it to them. You have the power to do that.
Finally if you are a single mother, with sons, like I said earlier I was a product of a household that only had my mom in it. Although growing up without a father, didn’t affect me in the same way it did the young man I mentioned earlier. It did affect me in so many other ways. But God! God gave me a mom, who realized I needed a strong male role model in my life. She introduced me to the boy’s scouts, boys clubs which help to define some of my man hood. They could not do all of what my father was meant to do, but they helped to instill some identity in me. So single mothers start there find positive male role models to help influence your sons, if the father in his life is not available. More importantly, make sure he is involved in a good church home, and encourage him to read the Word of God so that his heavenly father can help impart in him, who he really is. Offer your children back to God as Hannah did in 1 Samuel 1.
I encourage you to make comments and share! Thanks all for reading. FATHERS STAND UP!
“Morning Manna” with Shelton Seworth
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